Flowers and Farewells

August 12th, 2011

Aug. 12, 2011


I am grateful to everyone who joined me in thinking about silence and experimenting with ways to bring more silence into our daily lives. Over the past year I’ve learned to slow down, to listen more attentively, and to seek out quiet and peaceful places. Posting to this blog has helped me minimize idle distractions, protect myself from negative voices, and play more freely with creativity.

Most importantly, observing silence has taught me that ample rest is essential to my well-being.

Wishing everyone health, peace and happiness!

Sidewalk Sinatra

August 7th, 2011

Meet Gary, a construction worker from Queens who is working on the much-awaited Second Avenue subway line. During his lunch hour he sings a little Sinatra for his fellow New Yorkers.

Sometimes when silence is not available, a little music softens the noise of traffic.

What’s your favorite animal?

July 27th, 2011

It is a hot summer afternoon and I am looking at a pig. Large, pale pink, smeared with dust, bristly, and panting, the pig lies on its side in the shade of a wooden shed. It hasn’t moved in the past twenty minutes. My brother sits cross-legged on the cement, having positioned himself directly opposite the pig, so that he can look straight at its face. He is staring attentively at the pig, watching its every move, even though it never moves. He looks like a besotted lover watching his beloved sleep. In fact, the pig is probably asleep; its eyelids are almost closed.

Pigs at the Zoo

Leo Wong, 10 February, 1985

I examine my brother’s face. Chin propped in his hands, elbows on his knees, he is blissfully unaware of my impatient mood. He is daydreaming about the pig, perhaps imagining the pig’s dreams. He is utterly content and at peace.

“Leo? Let’s go see the river otters. Remember when we saw them playing in the water last week?”

He doesn’t turn his head towards me. “Not yet. I’m watching the pig.”
“Still? Why do you have to stay here so long?”
“I love pigs.”

Leo Wong, 24 November, 1985

This is our weekly routine. Every Wednesday, our mother teaches violin students in our living room. She hands me money and kisses us goodbye as the doorbell rings. Hand in hand, my brother and I walk up the hill, then down the gentle slope to the Storyland Valley Zoo at the end of the road. I pay our admission, and snatch glimpses of other animals as Leo pulls my hand with determination, heading straight to the pig. Leo sits down in his appointed spot, right across from the pig, and refuses to budge until he has had his fill of pig-watching.

I am bored. I explore the entire area adjacent to the pig’s enclosure with my eyes. I see dirt, dead grass, the fence against which Leo presses his face, an intriguing house-sized cage next door with tropical birds drowsing in the afternoon heat. I sidle toward the cage and position myself so that I can watch the birds while still keeping an eye on my brother in the background. I could walk further away from him, probably visit two or three other animals while he is entranced by the pig, but I can’t take that risk. If anything happens to him, my parents will never forgive me. I’m responsible for getting him back home, safe and happy, once the lessons are finished. I am the third parent.

Leo Wong, undated.

During Leo’s pig phase, he drew pictures of pigs, made pig-like sounds, received toy pigs for every special occasion, and watched that same pig every week for the whole summer. When we asked him not to “eat like a pig,” he would reply, “Why not? I love pigs.” He squealed with delight when grandmother brought him a huge life-sized pig toy from Japan, covered with fabric in a curious floral pattern reminiscent of an Irish granny’s dining room. The two of us spent many happy hours playing with that huge pig.

Christmas card for Leo, undated

My Christmas card for Leo, undated

As Leo matured, he stopped worshipping pigs.  Now, as an adult artist, he paints many kinds of animals, especially African wildlife, and his #1 top favorite is hyenas. I think he first fell in love with hyenas when they appeared onstage as masked humans in military-style khaki combat boots, snarling rebelliously and plotting against the Lion King.

In India, on the last day of his trip, I ask, “Why do you like hyenas so much?”
“Because they’re carnivores.”

Hyenas are powerful, strong, clever animals who eat fresh meat. Like dogs, but running wild and free. They watch larger predators kill their prey, then move in to scavenge their meals. When Leo eyes my unfinished plate, asking “Ummm.. do you have plans for that?” he is scavenging extra food along with the hyenas.

Leo Wong, Tuesday July 20, 2004

Leo opens his mouth and emits a sound I’ve never heard from any human throat before. It is a low growl, almost like a Tuvan throat-singer’s undertone, which I cannot reproduce no matter how I try. After years of voice lessons, he can relax his throat and reach below the normal range of his baritone voice to produce this frightening, throaty growl.

When I heard that sound, I knew I had to make a hyena mosaic. I started by collecting all the baddest hyena photos I could find, making a collage to inspire me as I worked on the mosaic.

Collage of hyena photos from various sources

I made the hyena mosaic using Mexican smalti (glass) for the hyena’s body and mixed grey marble and glass in black and shades of dark purple for the growl. While following the shape of the hyena whose photo is bottom center in the collage, a bright red/orange crown emerged unbidden on her head, so I let it stay. The tongue, eyes and nose are custom-made glass fusions that I ordered from the British mosaic artist Martin Cheek.

Hyena

Snarling Hyena, March 22, 2011

Tomorrow, on Thursday, July 28, 2011, Leo will be 40 years old. Happy birthday, Leo! May this Snarling Hyena Queen live in your bedroom and bring you the power to enjoy your life with gusto.

On silent retreat

July 8th, 2011

I am leaving today for a few days of silent contemplation amid trees, birds and deer. I have missed spending time in the woods. Last time I was there, it was winter and I picked my way among snow-covered branches. This time, seven months later, I’ll be surrounded by insects and the smell of green.

I won’t ask any questions, and I won’t answer anyone’s questions. Such a relief for a person whose job is to wrestle with questions using words every day.

Maybe it’s a good time to re-visit our discussion about silent retreats a few months ago, entitled How does retreating into silence help others?

Leaves and Moon in Saskatoon

July 3rd, 2011
Leaves and Moon

Photo by Yin Liu, Fall 2010

My friend Yin Liu took this photo in Saskatoon, from the Education parking lot at the University of Saskatchewan. The tiny white speck in the sky is a bird, just below and to the left of the moon.

I first met Yin in 1985 at Old Scona Academic High School. Her writing astonished us all, in two senses. First, she could answer any essay question in a couple of elegantly succinct paragraphs that were more complete and satisfying than any other classmate’s pages of rambling prose. Second, whenever the English and Social Studies teachers photocopied her essays for us to admire, we marvelled at her neat handwriting. Always in sharp pencil, wide margins, uniformly sized yet personal, like italic font on a computer, except we were still in the age of typewriters back then.

Singapore’s loss was Canada’s gain, without a doubt.

Why I write – Response to Foucault

June 9th, 2011

A friend sent me her rough translation of a quote from the eminent French philosopher Michel Foucault which really annoyed me because it embodies what bothers me about some professional philosophers. I find it pretentious and self-absorbed. It also SO doesn’t capture my experience of writing. Here it is:

Does there exist a pleasure in writing? I don’t know. One thing is certain, that there is, I think, a very strong obligation to write. I don’t really know where this obligation to write comes from … You are made aware of it in a number of different ways. For example, by the fact that you feel extremely anxious and tense when you haven’t done your daily page of writing. In writing this page you give yourself and your existence a kind of absolution. This absolution is indispensable for the happiness of the day… How is it that that this gesture which is so vain, so fictitious, so narcissistic, so turned in on itself and which consists of sitting down every morning at one’s desk and scrawling over a certain number of blank pages can have this effect of benediction on the rest of the day? …

You write so that the life you have around you, and outside, far from the sheet of paper, this life which is not much fun, but annoying and full of worries, exposed to others, can melt into the little rectangle before you and of which you are the master.. But this absorption of swarming life into the immobile swarming of letters never happens.

Michel Foucault, (2004) [1969] Michel Foucault à Claude Bonnefoy – Entretien Interprété par Éric Ruf et Pierre Lamandé, Paris: Gallimard. CD.

Sky over Brooklyn, June 2011

Cher Monsieur Foucault,

I write because I don’t hear my voice in other people’s writing. The thoughts that circle in my head repeatedly are important and valuable, I’ve finally come to see that, but I’m dismayed to discover that what seems to be common sense (to me) is actually very far away from what most other people believe is true. I go into bookstores and look for books on the topics I think are crucial, and there is nothing there, just a tiny, imperceptible gap between the glossy spine of one book and the next. As if the things that matter to me didn’t exist at all.

For me being in philosophy is like exploring a landscape where there is incredible detail in some places, and then in between there are these blobby areas where it’s just vague, undefined and blurry, like what I see when I don’t have my glasses on. I know there is something to see and to explore there, but nobody has bothered to look, maybe because people like me haven’t been doing philosophy for very long.

I write to map out territories that I know like the back of my hand. The struggle is to find words and photos and sounds to convey what I have lived, to an audience composed of people who have no idea whereof I speak. The pain is in finding that no matter what words I use, some things just don’t translate. Some things cannot be learned through reading words; some things must be lived.

When I write, I think of the many people who do things and make things and cook and clean and care for vulnerable people in our daily lives, the oh-so-hectic lives away from the blank page. I feel a responsibility to write because I have the privilege of getting to paid to write and think, because those people don’t have the time or the words to write about what they know.

And when I have written as much as I can for one day, I go out into the sun and hope that what I have written will make a difference to someone, some day.

Duet for Tree Frogs and Crickets

May 22nd, 2011

Last week at the Royal Navy Dockyard in Bermuda, I heard the voices of tree frogs for the first time, accompanied by my old friends, the crickets.

The interesting thing is that while I was recording, I could clearly hear some music playing in a nearby restaurant. I wondered whether the frogs and crickets would be drowned out by the music.

In this video, it seems that the frogs and crickets prevailed. Listen to the way their rhythms interlock and overlap. I wonder what they are saying?

How to Be Alone

May 19th, 2011

I’ve found that seeking silence often leads me to spend time alone, which really means paying attention to myself and to nature (or sometimes art), without being distracted by other people.

I never understood why some friends shuddered when I said I was going to see a movie alone.

“Oh no, I could never do that!”
“Why not?”
“I don’t know… it would feel so awkward to go and watch a movie without having anyone to share it with. It would be like eating in a restaurant alone.”
“Hmmm. But we read books alone all the time, don’t we?”

Actually, eating alone in a restaurant with a book in my hand is one of my favorite things to do.

Today I saw this video by film-maker Andrea Dorfman and poet/singer/songwriter Tanya Davis.

Davis wrote the beautiful poem and performed in the video. Dorfman directed, shot, animated by hand and edited this video. It was shot in Halifax, Nova Scotia, so the familiar Canadian inflections and Maritime scenes touched my heart gently.

I like the way Dorfman adds her colorful doodles right on top of the video, just like a child scribbling joyfully over the pages of a book to add her perspective. And yes, Davis talks about the role of silence in seeking solitude, and the importance of practicing one’s art while alone.

New Friends from Camphill

May 4th, 2011

Last week, I attended a symposium entitled “Being Human in the 21st Century: New Ways of Thinking.” This symposium was hosted by the Camphill village at Kimberton Hills, PA. Attendees came from Pennsylvania, Massachusetts, New York, Vermont, Ontario, and British Columbia.

(Note to symposium participants: if I’ve missed your hometown, please let me know in the comments and I’ll add it.)

Onstage with Mike Skubic, Judith Snow, Eva Kittay, and Dan McKanan

With Mike Skubic, Judith Snow, Eva Kittay, and Dan McKanan

I didn’t get a photo of all eight keynote speakers together, but here are five of us. This was my first time meeting the Canadian activist leader, writer and artist Judith Snow with her assistant Mike Skubic. Eva Kittay is the Stony Brook philosopher and mentor who inspired me to write about people with intellectual disabilities with her book Love’s Labor. Dan McKanan is a Harvard theologian whose book Touching the World: Christian Communities Transforming Society presents Camphill Village Minnesota and other life-sharing communities as being capable of enriching the broader society in which they exist.

With Annie, Eva and Chris at Camphill Kimberton Hills

With Annie, Eva and Chris

Annie Jackson and Chris Stuhlmann both live at Heartbeet Lifesharing in Vermont. They sat together in the front row for all the keynote speeches and made many interesting comments during the small conversation groups. Annie proudly told me she has lost 120 pounds since moving to Camphill in March 2009, which is a remarkable achievement. Chris wrote a very moving poem and read it to everyone on the last morning of our symposium.

With Susie and Red

With Susie and Red

I met Susie Newcomb during the Clowning workshop, where we watched each other improvise in the moment. She continues to inspire me with her gold crown and adventurous sense of style. My ambition is to make a truly funky necklace that captures some of Susie’s spirited creativity.

I learned a lot of new things during my four days at Camphill Kimberton Hills. It’s a marvelous experience to be generously fed, hosted, and welcomed with open arms by people who have chosen to live rurally, sharing their lives and resources so that everyone can have what they need to flourish.

Dining Room at Beaver Farm

Inside one of the houses at Camphill Beaver Farm

Even though I was still recovering from illness, I felt quite well staying with the Camphill folks. That meant a lot to me. I am very grateful for their kind hospitality, and I hope to visit more Camphill villages when I get a chance.

 

If you are curious, click these links to learn more about Camphill,

admire the public murals in Toronto created by Judith Snow’s organization, CAVE, or

read an interview with Annie Jackson in the Heartbeet Newsletter, Spring 2010.

…if you’re new, click here to read more posts from the Silence Project

See the Sand Mandala of Compassion taking shape in Brooklyn

May 2nd, 2011

March 2010

Venerable Tenzin Yignyen, a Buddhist monk from the personal monastery of the Dalai Lama, will be here in Brooklyn, New York creating “AVALOKITESHVARA: The Sand Mandala of Compassion.”

Visitors are welcome to stop in anytime while he is working: Monday May 9 through Thursday May 12, from 9am–12pm and 1pm-4pm.

Location: Launchpad at 721 Franklin Avenue, between Sterling Place & Park Place, in Brooklyn, New York, USA.

Last year Lama Tenzin was here in March, which coincided with my spring break. I went on the first day and was so entranced that I went back every day to watch the mandala’s progress.

I heard Lama Tenzin teach the meanings of his mandala to a lively group of two-year-olds with their parents and caregivers. He also discussed the finer points of Tibetan Buddhism with adults, and addressed school groups at all levels. It was a wonderful lesson in reaching audiences at different stages of understanding with the same consistent message.

Mandala Book

I have put together an 11-page photo book, which you may download here to show to your kids:
http://sophiawong.info/mandala/

If you have the opportunity, I urge you to go see him next week. It’s worth taking an hour off from work to see it.

On Friday May 13 at 1 pm, everyone present will be invited to participate in sweeping up the entire mandala.  Then we will each take home a little baggie of mixed sand and offer it to nearby waters in a “dismantling ceremony” for the benefit of marine life, the environment and all sentient beings.

I am sure you and your children, nieces, nephews and/or grandchildren will be very intrigued and engaged to see this work of art being created, one grain of sand at a time.

If you go, please post your comments below!